Let’s Make it Clear

primitive  social style

It’s been a while since I’ve posted on my WordPress blog so here we go. I think it’s about time for a post like this, long overdue.

So, for the last few months, I’ve been trolling and watching the social medialites blab on their soliloquies, wondering if anyone is really listening or reading for that matter.

A few months ago, one of the automated paper.li tweets mentioned a person (who shall remain nameless), who became upset at the fact they were mentioned.

What the fuck, I thought to myself. Why is this person getting a hair up their ass over being mentioned by paper.li – when the paper is actually promoting their stupid shit.

I’m not one to argue with people on Twitter. The back and forth banter just doesn’t look good and at the end of the day, I’m running a business. I’m not here to throw mud at idiots (maybe once in a while LOL).

So I ended up blocking this person. Funny this person has noted in their profile they’re a coach or expert on some sort of fetish thing.

Right….and I’m an expert on building the Brooklyn Bridge.

Yet again, a similar incident happened with another person, who shall remain nameless. Bear in mind, some of these people are not even worth putting on blast and I’ll get to that “why” in a minute.

I see a response from the paper.li tweet, “Please take me off this or I will have you all blocked”, something to that effect. This time I didn’t hold back.  My response was pretty clear about this automated tweet and if you don’t like it we’ll just block you.  #stuckup

I mean really? What the fuck is wrong with people? Yet here’s another one who owns something similar to Kink~E Magazine #WeOpenTheDoor – all of these sites mind you are the same as my magazine.

Now I’m not saying Kink~E Magazine was the first fetish magazine ever. Back in the day, newspapers and personals were used in order to connect with kink communities. The only logical way back then was connecting via newspapers and personals through letter writing and perhaps phone contact.

When I began establishing my presence online was in mid 2000, when AOL gave you your own webpage as part of your subscription and I began keeping an online diary of my blind dates.  My friends thought I was insane to put my life out there, but at the time, and still now, I didn’t care. It was a great way for me to share exactly what was going on in my life, what I felt about blind dating and the blind dating itself. This was sort of a release for me. Life wasn’t good for me back then. I made a terrible choice that ended up saving my life. I did’t see it then but I see it now. Anyway as part of my restoration of self progress I was keeping these online dairies and it helped me put a lot of things into perspective with my life, myself and my needs of what I wanted in a relationship.

Even when guys got wind of my blogging, I realized they were only dating me so I can blog about them, even when they knew there was a bigger possibility of me writing not so good things about them. Maybe they were learning themselves how to be better on the next date. Who knows?

I did discover this. Because of my blogging, I was able to connect with women who related to the horrors of blind dating and it gave me an idea on how to expand on that and incorporating fetish lifestyle, one I personally live and enjoy. It was important for me to connect some type of alternative lifestyle because it wasn’t good for women to secretly keep ideas of fetish to themselves or feel shame to express something they really liked and wanted to explore. So there’s your bit of history of Kink~E Magazine.

The Internet was just booming by then and other than your local newspapers, how many fetish magazine sites did you find in 2002 as oppose to now? Today we are saturated with endless means of fetish advice, domination along with the fakers looking to rake in fast cash without having to honor what they say they are offering.

I’m not going to put down my magazine by any means.  I really believe that having this opportunity, I opened the door along with others who are still around today who believe in promoting the alternative lifestyle correctly.

I’m sure anyone that looks at the magazine thinks to themselves, “Oh I can do this better”.  I’m sure you can.

On the other hand, thanks to my business management courses and communication courses (yes unlike most I’m actually getting a real degree), I continue to transition the magazine and once again it will be seeing another transition. So while people are taking a back seat stealing ideas, they have yet to see what my pretty little head is putting together.

One thing I’ve learned about all of these social medialites and their sites, everyone is a “shark” waiting for their hater to disclose what they are doing so they can copy it. Don’t think I even noticed one site who conveniently copied the same last four digits of my business phone number. (Yeah I caught that).

Now back to my “why” point about not putting people on blast. First and foremost they aren’t worth it. Second and most importantly, why bother give these assholes any type of notoriety?

If you’re paying attention to your social media feed, really read what people are writing. If you’re following someone who’s apparently some coach of sorts, why is it they become easily offended over a tweet that’s actually promoting them? Wouldn’t that defeat the purpose of someone who claims they are here to enhance your self esteem but catch an attitude at the mere fact they are being mentioned in a positive way? Also, think about this, why aren’t people looking up what paper.li is?

It’s super easy. All you have to do is go on google and type in paper.li…wow how simple is that?

Here’s another thing about me. I’m not one to pitch a fucking fit if someone tags me on something. Actually, I’m grateful that other people in supporting communities think of me or my magazine to tag us and help them not only promote but inform.

Wow…let’s read that word again….”Inform”.

me

Resting Bitch Face Part II

I mean I would think so….unless I missed the memo of the weekly stupidity report. (I always seem to miss those.)

Oh this is a good example. Recently, the President and his wife went on a venture trip and part of that trip was to visit the Pope. According to protocol, the first lady is supposed to dress in black with a veil. The next day I get up and there are hash tags going around she’s dressing for her future.

Look, motherfuckers, it’s shit like this that pisses me off. I think to myself how other countries must look at us and how stupid we are. Does anyone do their homework or research or are you taking things at face value.  I go and look up as to why Melania Trump is dressed like this and find out when Michelle Obama when to visit the pope with her husband she was also dressed in the same get up. So where was the hashtag for her? Not…right? Protocol dummies. #DoYourHomework

I never thought I would see such a level of stupidity and on a daily basis.

Am I pissed off? Hell yeah? Please people wake up and read. Take a history course. If you don’t know something or a term in social media, look the shit up before flying off on the deep end making all sorts of unrealistic threats, especially over a mention on paper.li. There is too much shit going on in this world to solely focus on hate that’s not going to change.  Hello Manchester fucking assholes. While everyone is diluted in their own hate look at the shit going on around you!

I mean, really?

And then here we are back at the lab where you have some of these bitches talking about they’re a coach? An advisor? A sexpert (now there’s a recent term for the last few years).

All of these are great names while most aren’t backed up with a degree. #Sad.

What’s even sadder is no one is evolving. People spend more time copying and not really make a real name for themselves other than social media. Whoever their followers are, they make a star for themselves but let me tell you ladies, once you step out the door of your apartment, you are like everyone else. No one is stopping you in the street for an autograph. You’re not getting nominated for Person of the Year in Time Magazine or a star in the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

I’m not sure what we are coming to. Almost frightening when I think about it.  I try to stay in my own lane and focus on finishing my book An Illegal Affair (which is in its final stages before proofreading), but at times I veer off course and see stupid shit like, (in valley girl voice), “you betta take me off that tweet or I’m going to block you”.

Really, fuck you bitch. No one has time for such meagerness.

Good luck being 60 and thinking you’re going to get some man to pay you for a BDSM session.

That’s the funny part. Some of these women are forgetting day by day they are getting older.

Better think about your future princesses.

Until then.

Marabelle Blue~

Married At First Sight – Cohabitation and Happy New Year

Ryan D. and Jaclyn

jaclyn-ryan-ranellone-married-at-first-sight-season-2

After Ryan and Jaclyn were able to establish a living situation, they consummated their relationship. However, this relationship didn’t start off as a romantic one.

When those doors opened up it was similar reaction to Jamie when she married Doug. Not a very happy one. And even though Jaclyn said, “I do”, inside she was screaming, “I don’t”. Makes me wonder why women continue to just say yes to something where they really want to say no.

Anyway, getting back to this couple, because they are reality television, I’m sure they had to sign some kind of disclosure saying they would stick with this for the next six weeks and even though a honeymoon can make everything exciting, reality is what sets in when the vacation is over and real life steps in.

For this couple things seems to be getting off on a good foot, however, because of Jaclyn’s very possessive and strong attitude, it seems that she tries to castrate Ryan by playing the man role too, instead of just letting Ryan be the man in the relationship.

Behavior like this for me is when someone is really not that into you and will play the role of, “let’s be buddies and hang out and get to know each other.” I think they had a show like this on Bravo who followed couples that were best of friends but one of them was secretly into the other….I don’t know whatever happened to that show. Bravo goes through shows, like ATL Housewives go through hair weaves.

I’ve been known to go out on dates with guys that I was not interested in and would take over the conversation to ensure that this will not go any further and they will remain in the friend zone. Since I don’t like to play games, rest assured, it ended that night when the date was over.

Ryan lived with his family and extremely close to them. Due to the loss of his sister and then his brother in law, he was raising his niece, basically stepping in as the parents this little girl lost. Having to make a move and be away from his family, Ryan was definitely going through withdrawal but seemed ready to make the compromise and sacrifice to co-habitat with his new wife.

For Jaclyn, who seemed to struggle with the new man in her life, started to see a different side of Ryan once they began to get their house in order.

While I agree with Dr. Joseph, there is a side of yourself you have to let go in order to allow someone in your life, you also have to do it with common sense. Just because a doctor told you that this is your ideal mate it doesn’t mean that’s necessarily true.

I think what is lacking in this relationship like the rest of the cast is the courting which seemed to take place with Cortney, Jason, Doug and Jamie. They all were very committed to making their relationships work which included romance.

I’m not really seeing that with this couple…for now at least. Jaclyn is a very outspoken woman and you know sometimes, guys don’t like that. While they like women who exude strength they certainly don’t like to look like an idiot.

New Year’s day, visiting her family, she made it a point to share that under no circumstances she wants to have a child after 35. And not saying this in private but saying this in front of her family.

I think in relationships, there are certain conversations you should have in private and not in front of family members. This was definitely not topic of discussion saved for family and friends.

Davina and Sean

davina-sean-married-at-first-sight-season-2

The team of experts paired Davina and Sean on the main commonality that they were both bullied while growing up. Davina lives and owns an apartment in New York, which Sean owns a house in New Jersey. Both have agreed that for now living separate during certain days of the week while Sean goes to work, will just have to work for the time being. Even though Davina doesn’t like this idea, this is something that she’s temporarily dealing with only to appease Sean.

Here’s another couple with a situation where one loves living in New York while the other isn’t really having it. I think once someone lives in New Jersey and becomes accustomed to living a certain lifestyle, who really wants to live in the hustle of New York. If the man has to drive into work, who wants to drive back and spend an enormous amount of money for parking? Not ideal for New York City living.

Davina isn’t willing to make a compromise.

Sean made a private call from Dr. Joseph regarding their relationship how the chemistry was initially strong to now a friendship level of relationship.

While Dr. Joseph informs Sean to not be hard on himself on his feelings and anxiety, he should find understanding on himself and be accepting of what he’s feeling and find a solution through it.

I think Dr. Joseph is right, BUT, let’s be real here….I mean, this is reality television isn’t it?

Davina comes from a culture where most relationships are arranged, therefore there isn’t really a pursuit or courting. However, Davina who is Americanized and has exposure to American culture understands what is means to be courted or romanced. At least that is what we are taught. Just tune in to, “Say Yes to the Dress”, that’s all you hear and quite honestly that’s what women want. So what happens when you meet someone and marry them at first sight? Where is the romance? Sounds like a repeat of Ryan R. and Jaclyn.

Ryan D. and Jessica

mafs-s2-e2-ep-nav-474x268-alt-img

Now this couple, I questioned on every episode. They did have sex the first night and I’m sure they plenty of sex during the honeymoon, but after the honeymoon, everything changed and things got pretty serious and pretty nasty in a matter of three short weeks.

Jessica is not a girl who communicates her feelings at all. She says she cooks but she doesn’t cook, she says she wants closet space but she doesn’t express that, she says the kitchen will always be clean but gets a nasty response in return. He gets angry because she irons on the bed, she’s tired of sushi, she’s mad because he took their wedding money for himself, oh and let’s forget how he thinks pierces are nasty or tacky and she took out her Monroe piercing to “make a change” but yet he has a shit load of tattoos. What the fuck?

Ryan is very ghetto when he talks to her and Jessica seems to get shut out when she does. They continue to have big arguments and even after celebrating New Years Eve together as a couple, I didn’t see a loving couple at all.

It’s almost as if when everything is good, it’s really good, but just for the time being and when everything is bad, it’s really bad.

So far the last few episodes ending with Happy New Year so far isn’t happy for all of the couples.

All blogs on current reality shows found on www.realonreality.com

Married at First Site Season Two – New Couples New Problems

married-at-first-sight-season-2-weddingsThe season starts with three new couples who are paired once again by the experts, Dr. Pepper Schwartz, Joe Cilona, Dr. Logan Levkoff, and spiritualist Greg Epstein.

The couples are Sean and Davina, Ryan R and Jaclyn and Ryan D and Jessica

How the experts paired these couples it seemed were based on past experiences.

For Sean and Davina, both experienced bullying in their childhood lives. Davina who is Indian and beautiful, I must add, was bullied as a child for being different. Her father had abandoned their family when she was growing up so she lacked that experience of having a man figure in her life, however, it seems it doesn’t affect who she is as a woman. Davina reminds me of me in some ways. Yes as a child I was bullied but I did have a present father growing up who never abandoned our family. She, like me, also prefers Caucasian men. Not sure if it’s a thing where she has the same reasons as to why she doesn’t like Indian men as the way I’m not attracted to Latin men.

Both she and Sean worked in the medical field, Davina in pharmaceuticals and Sean in trauma.

Ryan R and Jaclyn both said their “I do’s”, however Jaclyn who hasn’t had sex in more than two years has big reservations on Ryan R who’s really not attractive but not overly ugly. I can understand when she said that there’s something about his face that didn’t sit right with her. If you’re blind you would see it too. Definitely something going on with the front teeth, veneers of some sort so I get it. Sure I think it’s important to date someone with nice teeth, however it’s not a total deal breaker for me. If the man is good, makes money and can take care of you, she should give him a chance. I noticed though she does things that I normally would do when I’m not attracted to someone when I would go on a blind date and be a bit rambunctious – for example the way she threw his drink and told him he needs to drink this or in the next episode on their honey moon when she ordered the steaks for them instead of letting him order his own meal.

Ryan D and Jessica were both paired due to the same commonalities. They are both independent and have been single for a long time and family is very important. The stability of life is what’s important to the both of them.

The only couples that are immediately attracted to each other right now are Ryan D. and Jessica, Sean and Davina.  For Ryan R. and Jaclyn it seems that Ryan R. right now is not seeing that Jaclyn is really not that into him.

After the wedding, it was picture time and while all the couples seem happy in their pictures, it looks like Jaclyn’s brave face it starting to fail her as she’s becoming impatient and irritable. What I find strange is what Dr. Pepper Schwartz says physical match is not that important but trust in the experiment because they share essential values.

Really?

Why do people connect in the first place? Why is it that the other couples are getting along well? They are having that physical attraction. I believe, without that, tell me where the relationship is going. Granted he does not have to look like what women think Brad Pitt is, for me it’s Kyle Secor and Peter Coyote in his younger days, if there isn’t a physical attraction how can one move past that and fall in love with the other important qualities if you can’t see them on top of you.

For me I just can’t get past that. I have met the nicest of guys but if I was not psychically attracted to them, the men remained as friends and not anything more.

This season seems to also focus more on the family, along with their thoughts and feelings on the whole scenario on a blind arranged marriage.

While the couples are off after their husband/wife announcements and celebrating their nuptials at the reception, it’s now the time for the couples to be on their own in the hotel room.

Jaclyn is positive she will not be having sex with her husband Ryan, who’s mom mentioned earlier that she knows Jaclyn loves him as much as he loves her….? Um what?

Davina and Sean look like they are hitting it off very well, and Ryan D. and Jessica were sure not letting religion interfere with their relationship while Jaclyn struggles playing, “as if”, and wanting the experience to end.

Relationships take sacrifice, commitment, compromises and hard work. I can’t see someone making sacrifices for someone they barely know. Most people will chalk it up and say, “no love lost”, but will they ever learn anything from that experience by just taking the shortcut.

This is what people look for day in and day out. I have one person on my Facebook page that does nothing all day but bash women and talk about how he will only use them for sex. That’s the underlying notion that he really wants someone sincere and instead of putting himself out there and being honest, he’d rather sound like a scumbag.

Now while I can relate with is brutal honesty, the fact remains that what you put out there is what you will get.

For these couples, it’s just the beginning. And while some of them may be feeling the physical attraction, the question is will this outlive the reality of what it takes for a relationship to work and the one couple feeling the opposite, will they be the ones that will make a sacrifice to commit?

All blogs on current reality shows found on www.realonreality.com