The Bachelor Farmer Chris Soules E5 @c_soules

In this episode the girls are now leaving the house to go to Santa Fe, New Mexico where all of their dates will be.

Chris Harrison informs them that there will be two one-on-one dates and one group date.

Now that there are 11 girls left farmer Chris feels that they’ve passed the “getting to know you” stage and they should be all at a place where real and true relationships are forming.

Kelsey expressed the desperation that she really needed the one on one as well as Ashley while Whitney claims that she is falling for him (already?).

And surprise (and why?) Carly gets the first one on one date.

While Chris is waiting for Carly he says that he feels that she’s the perfect person for this date and feels they have a great friendship, but do they have anything more than that?

Carly and Chris’ date was guided by a spiritual guru who focuses on love and relationship through meditation.

The sessions consisted of playing a game of trust and Chris was blindfolded while Carly fed him an assortment of food and fruit, which instead of being sensual, turned out to a be sloppy mess and lacked a lot of chemistry.

carly being fakeI’m not sure why this date occurred, meaning the type of date. I really don’t think that this date was not appropriate and it was not a real way for anyone to get to know each other considering that this was a first one on one with Carly. They would’ve been better off having dinner and talking and getting to know each other. I don’t see Carly with him at all and had they had dinner and talked, probably Chris would have found out that no only does she have serious issues but she’s also not a very nice person. Hmmm no wonder her boyfriend of two years didn’t want to touch her.

And this love guru, if she’s such an expert she would have had them do a different type of exercise. Is this how she handles a couple on their first date? I don’t think I would want to strip with someone that I may not be interested in.

Cutting back to the ladies back at the house, Kelsey shares with the girls about her husband dropping dead on his way to work and Ashley I. found that it was strange that she decided to share the story and how nonchalant she was as she was telling the story.

I can sort of agree only because when Juelia was talking about her husband killed himself she was literally falling apart.

The group date card comes in and the names are read as follows Jade, Megan, Kaitlyn, Whitney, McKenzie, Becca, Samantha, Ashley and Kelsey.

Now this makes Britt excited because she has the one on one date with Chris and leaves Kelsey annoyed that again she’s stuck on another group date.

After the intimacy date Carly and Chris head back and have a dinner and she begins to discuss her past relationship. Apparently she spent two years with a man that she wasn’t physical with and how this affected her deeply. She wasn’t sure where the relationship was going and why wasn’t this man interested in taking the relationship a step further. First off, this is a major red flag. Hello Chris, wake up and smell the issues. Any woman that’s sharing this clearly has something going on. Really? Why would anyone stay with a man that’s not interested in her physically? What is the point of staying in that type of relationship? Carly clearly has some low self esteem issues going on and with all that being said, what does Chris do…he gives her the “blah blah” speech on how beautiful she is and gives her a rose.

Hashtag: Confusion.

On the group date all of the girls figured out that they were going white water rafting for which of course does not please Kelsey as she is focused on having that one on one time with him.

Chris expressed how important it is that a woman enjoys the outdoors because most of his life is spent outdoors and listening to Ashley I. who has clearly convinced herself that she is the one for him.

It’s so funny when something happens to someone on a group date and other girls start to make fun of what the situation, as per Jade, who fell in the water, so now everyone thinks she’s playing helpless victim so Chris can come to her rescue.

Whitney, who was on this group date expressing how important time is with Chris and how she really needs to have that one on one time with him now that the rafting date is over. As they are in the lounge waiting for Chris, he’s intercepted by Jordan who was eliminated in week two and for some reason she look completely different I didn’t even recognize who she was when she stepped over to Chris.

jordan and chris

She seemed very humbled as she expressed how important second chances were and apologized for her behavior. Blaming the wine she drank, she told Chris that it wasn’t really who she was and she didn’t get a chance to represent herself appropriately. Against the better judgment of himself, he decided to do that and bought Jordan right into the lion’s nest when the group of ladies were waiting for him and were none too pleased when he walked in with Jordan.

After some discontent from the ladies as each went on their one on one, Chris pulls her out from the group and sends her packing yet again. I’m not sure why Jordan came back in the first place, I mean is Chris that much of a contender that she drove all the way from Colorado to see if she can win his heart? I don’t know thinking back on the ladies that Chris got rid of, he definitely let go some good women that should have been there.

Of course Ashley had much to say on Jordan’s short return because she really thinks that her make out sessions locks in a rose for her. Apparently she believes she is the right person for Chris when she’s not. She also wasted her one to one time to compare herself to everyone else and failing to use that time to get to know one another…okay okay we all know that’s a waste of time. Ashley won’t even last to the top four.

chris and britt on hot air balloon The date card arrives for Britt. The card reads “the skies the limit”. Uh oh is this another jump off a high rise building moment? And Britt who would do anything for Chris spills the water works because she’s afraid of heights and she just cannot do anything that will involve jumping off anything.  Seriously who can blame her? How many dates have lasted with someone jumping off the building, making out (because it’s a romantic moment) and never getting to a top four?  Absolutely pointless!

Getting back to Jordan, (afterthought) even though Jordan seemed sincere, I was still feeling as I was watching that Farmer Chris is getting rid of some good women so why are Ashley and Kelsey there? Clearly these are two women who aren’t for him.

The priceless moment is when Chris gives his speech before handing the rose out how this particular woman makes him feel special and that he thinks that they have a lot of potential together. I know that Ashley didn’t think he was talking about her and why so shocked when Whitney got the rose. No one at that date looked happy after he gave her the rose.

Here are my thoughts on Whitney which I touched upon when she was talking to his sisters. She seems forced not a force to be reckoned with. And I also understand Ashley’s point about Whitney being a fake. I think it’s just coming to a point where she works as a fertility nurse seeing and working with all of these couples who are looking to have children. It’s kind of like if you’re hanging out at the barbershop where women with long hair would get short hair cuts, after you made it a point you would never chop off your hair.  Sooner or later, the short hair would look so appealing that you leave the barber shop with short hair.  Whitney is a career woman. Who will need a fertility specialist in a town of population 427?

The next day, Chris sneaks into Britt’s room to surprise her for their one on one date. As she’s getting up I’m back in what Carly said about Britt not bathing and goes to sleep with makeup. I think if women do that sooner or later they will care about their face and wash it and not worry that their husband will judge them for a natural look. However I did notice she wore those red sneakers quite often.

Terrified that she may have to jump off a building with Chris, she’s pleasantly surprised that it’s a hot air balloon ride.

While Britt and Chris were out on their date, Ashley gossiping that Britt had confided in her how Britt was happy being single she doesn’t understand why anyone would want to have kids. So in other words Ashley is insinuating that Britt is a liar and not here for the right reasons.

Carly,  who’s now emotionally invested, is worried that Chris’ relationship with Britt is a stronger connection than hers which leave her overly emotional. This is her first “relationship” where someone actually reciprocated their feelings towards her. So now she’s afraid in the time that she’s invested with Chris that it will fall through because of Britt.

Kelsey also chimes in with her comments about Chris and ruining her relationship with him. Um Kelsey, what relationship with Chris? Upon Chris’ return on his date with Britt (or it could have been the next day), Kelsey takes matters into her own hands and runs to Chris’ hotel room because the story must be told about her husband dying.

I’m pretty sure that Kelsey was going home this episode and from the looks of things she may have saved herself with her crocodile tears referring to her husband’s death.

At the rose ceremony nobody looked happy. They are all looking forward to having that extra one on one time with him for the cocktail rose ceremony because right now the only women who have roses are Whitney, Britt and Carly.

Tensions are running high as the women with no roses all express concern that they didn’t get enough time with Chris and while everyone is genuinely worried, Kelsey chimes in that she feels very comfortable that she will be getting a rose. Hmm talk about being overly overconfident and arrogant. And then she has a weird friendship with Britt because she seems to be hanging all over her but yet wasn’t she talking about her while Britt was on her one on one.

Chris comes in and makes a speech about a conversation he had with Kelsey that put things into perspective and in the middle of that speech he was overcome with emotion and walked out of the room. Up until then no one knew Kelsey had a conversation with him in private, in his hotel room. Now Kelsey had no choice but to disclose that she had this conversation with him and basically took advantage of the situation because she knew she wasn’t getting a rose.

Carly made a good point (surprisingly), saying that before Kelsey had this conversation with Chris he was fine, but then because she went behind everyone’s back, having this conversation, there’s a strong possibility that somebody else is going home because of what she did.

While Chris was talking with Chris Harrison, Kelsey tells the girls she knows what Chris is going to do and what decisions he’s going to make, and how time is precious, blah blah blah, going off on this weird tirade like she knows what the fuck she’s talking about.

Kelsey has barely had any kind of relationship with Chris and for her to say the things that she saying and talking about how she has to say goodbye to people because she knows what choices he made what the fuck is wrong with this woman. How do you sit there and cry your eyes out and in the midst of that start laughing like some kind of fucking weirdo.

Chris Harrison walks into let the girls know that farmer Chris has made up his mind and there will be no cocktail hour. Chris had made up his mind and he did not want to delay the inevitable, leaving now all the ladies uncertain about their future with Chris.

Ashley who relied on a make out session, was in hysteric of tears and Kelsey who was super duper confident, seems to be shitting in her pants as she gets up to use the ladies room where all of the sudden screams start  blaring from the other room and what looks like a paramedic helping none other than Kelsey who’s now on the floor, crying her eyes out…WTF?

kelsey on the floor crying

To be continued…

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